I was the person in high school who was nice, followed the rules, stayed sober to drive friends home after parties, and although I was friendly with many, I really lacked a tribe with whom I could be my authentic self. College was more of the same.
Finding my tribe continues to be a journey.
Over the last eight years, along with embracing a daily meditation practice, I have slowly begun to surround myself with amazing people who not only teach and inspire me but with whom I can openly and without apology be myself. Upon reflection, this only happened when I vulnerably allowed it.
If you are struggling to find that tribe that fuels your dreams and fills your heart – please know that it’s in reach!
I am often told that the mindful practices I share help people see life and its experiences in new and more nourishing ways. Part of this journey is becoming aware of the relationships around you that either feed or deplete you. Once you have this awareness you are in the most amazing space to begin connecting with “your” tribe.
Your Circle of Influence
We are the average of the five people we spend the most time with, Jim Rohn famously quoted. This theory of the law of averages states that the result of any given situation will be the average of all the individual outcomes. Take an inventory of the people you spend the most time with and assess if they fill or deplete you. How will you know? Close your eyes, take a couple of long, slow breaths, focus on each person and see what feelings arise. I like to use a Yum/Yuk scale and my tribe clearly have to leave me feeling Yum!
Be the Person Your Dog Thinks You Are
I have a 15 year old Jack Russell who I swear thinks I’m the most wonderful person on earth no matter how I look or how I act-out in my not-so-grounded moments. Don’t let your ego’s need for separation get in the way of you owning your beauty and uniqueness.
Look at how you show up in your circles and with total kindness towards yourself, step-up your game. For me this meant stopping the need to gossip or cut others down (so I could feel better). It meant setting intentions every morning to lift everyone I came in contact with; a complement, a smile, a thank-you, asking a friend how they were doing and listening…I mean, really listening.
I often find with communication today, in our fast-paced always-on world, that we listen to respond not to understand. The later can make a huge difference! And as my meditating mentor davidji says, “When you are mindful every word you speak and every action you take comes from a place that’s reflective rather than reflexive” That is a beautiful thing! #destressifying
Gratitude, The Perfect Outfit for Any Occasion
I love the deep wisdom in the Rumi quote, “Wear gratitude like a cloak and it will feed every corner of your life.”Gratitude’s ripple is contagious!
I’ve seen this in my weekly meditation classes and I’ve been intoxicated by its beauty and power to transform.
Begin each day with gratitude for your current tribe, the people who want the best for you and for whom you want the best.
As you find “your people,” nurture each other, fearlessly support each other in personal and spiritual growth, be vulnerable, be brave, and love each other.
We get that which we give so be generous to your tribe and your beautiful self.